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Kim's Lectures

 

Book a Lecture with Kim

Kim is available to speak on a variety of topics to schools, parents, therapists, and coaches. The lectures listed here are a sample of those available and offer a snapshot of the work that Kim has undertaken in his 30+ years as a counselor, researcher and educator. Click on a title below for more details.

REQUEST A LECTURE
 
 

Book a Lecture with Kim

Kim is available to speak on a variety of topics to schools, parents, therapists, and coaches. The lectures listed here are a sample of those available and offer a snapshot of the work that Kim has undertaken in his 30+ years as a counselor, researcher and educator. Click on a title below for more details.

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Lecture Descriptions

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Simplicity Parenting

In this presentation, Kim explains why less is more and presents five simplicity pathways you can take to help your child feel calmer, happier and more secure. This is the theme and the lecture which provided the inspiration for Kim’s book by the same name (published in August 2009 & 2019 2nd ed.). It presents not only the five simple steps, but examples of how to bring “the power of less” into your home on a daily basis.

So much of modern life seems to be about more. Very few presentation you will attend will suggest that you do less, but this is one of them. It quietly presents ‘do-able’ daily ways in which we can simplify our families lives and by doing so build resiliency within our children, tween and teens.

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The Soul of Discipline

A parent’s journey is filled with both precious moments and difficult situations. Our sense of how we are doing is often determined by the way in which we respond to the flashpoints of parenting. These moments will either refine or consume us. This presentation will set out three cumulative discipline phases. Firstly, training creative compliance for the young child, secondly, building emotional skills for the elementary age, and lastly, for the teenager, managing critical choices.

Because so many of our parenting and teaching challenges occur naturally as part of child development it is possible to anticipate these difficulties and to prepare for them in advance. For discipline to be effective it must always begin with preventive discipline. This presentation will provide a developmental roadmap to help parents and educators establish the kind of discipline that is both nurturing and effective.

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Social Inclusion

The social inclusion approach is a way of combating the problem of isolation that is, sadly, a growing part of the experience of most children today. Developed over 24 years with children from almost every continent, this approach gives practical playground, classroom and home based tools to work with social exclusion issues.

We explore Why certain children get picked on while others bully; how to make teasing guidelines the children understand and use; how to facilitate class and home meetings around social exclusion issues; how to actively engage peers, other students, in developing and implementing the Social Inclusion Approach. Most importantly, the workshop looks at how to develop a whole community approach and policy that is supported in your school and home.

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The No-Maybe-Yes Years

This presentation is designed to help parents of younger children prepare for the years ahead and also for parents who are working with kids of this age. It introduces many issues that challenge the modern-day tweenager, teenager, parent and teacher. We may explore many issues effecting young people between the ages of 10 and 18, and offer workable strategies for navigating what can be one of the most difficult periods for parents, teachers and teenagers alike.

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The Compassionate Response

Originally developed for use with violent men in domestic situations, this meditative method teaches participants a means of shifting reactive habits of communication and enables new ways of seeing others – your children, colleagues, partners, friends other family members. More importantly, it also enables you to shift reactive emotional habits and allows new ways of working with social tension, differences and other conflict.

Using the meditation, you can transform the ways you imagine other people. Instead of seeing just the difficulties between you, this meditation allows you to see past the behaviors, actions or words that cause you upset to meet, instead, the whole person – their unique splendor as human beings as well as the “icky bits” which grate on you and trigger unhelpful reactions.

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The Socially Resilient Child

While schools can do a lot to work through situations of teasing, parents can be very effective in giving their children some age appropriate simple strategies to avoid being caught up in the destructive cycle of teasing and bullying.

This is a talk and workshop that focuses on the effects of the fast paced life life many of our families experience and how social tensions at home and school can result in bullying, teasing and exclusion. A very do-able solution is offered that is tried and proven with countless families over the last 25 years. What is different about this approach, and some say unique, is that practical tools are given to family helpers and families that can be implemented right away that break the cycle of bullying and teasing.

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Tweens Discipline & Guidance

This is a wide-ranging topic that introduces many issues that challenge the modern-day tweenager, teenager, parent and teacher. This lecture discusses the issues effecting young people between the ages of 10 and 18, and discuss the workable strategies for navigating what is one of the most difficult periods for parents, teachers and teenagers alike. Topics include the phases of adolescence and how these may be expressed and anticipated; the similarities and the differing needs of boys and girls; an overview of addictive tendencies and how to meet them in creative ways and the defining the roles played within peer groups.

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Seeds of Kindness

In this workshop, Kim explores creative alternatives to aggressive behavior in early childhood and up to nine years of age. The style of workshop is a facilitated discussion that will address the issue of aggressive and antisocial behavior in children. Many topics are covered, depending on the specific needs of the audience.

As counterbalance to aggression, we explore ways of fostering a healthy sense of well being, wonder and awe. We look at appropriateness and equilibrium; where my space ends and the other child’s begins as well as trust, and the acceptance of boundaries. In some cases, we may also take a deeper look at the specific challenges that boys encounter at school, home and play.

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Resisting Harmony Addiction

This talk will focus on the relationship between the healthy inner and outer work we do with each other in the adult world and how this builds deep and durable social and emotional foundations for our kids. We will explore: Specific ways to calibrate our expectations of extended family, friends and school so we prevent the exhaustion of “relational over-reach” for ourselves and for our kids. Transforming the disappointment “harmony addiction” brings, into nourishing social flow. “Small is do-able.” The power of working within our sphere of parental influence. “Belonging” as a healthy process not a permanent right. Safe Family Base Camp vs. The World as a dangerous jungle. Embracing and eldering our kid’s social struggles.

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How To Have Devices Not Be Divisive

This talk will focus on the following topics: How to maintain loving limits, warm, firm and calm discipline and strong family connections in a world where increasingly “screens are supreme." How to build focus, grit and good judgment so that our kids do not become overwhelmed with media driven images but can shape their own self esteem, hopes and dreams. How to encourage respect when negative images of adults pervade pop culture. Fitting in with friends.  “Won’t my kids be disadvantaged if I limit screen media?” Aloneness vs. Loneliness.  Helping kids know the difference. The alluring world of no boundaries that screen use develops and how this makes discipline and guidance difficult. Virtuous VS. Virtual.  Building real and enduring relationships with people who will “be there” for you when times get tough.

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Being At Your Best When Your Kids Are At Their Worst 

In this lecture will look at how to stay engaged on the often frustrating and unpredictable “family dance floor” while at the same time watching from the calm and loving “parental balcony.” We will specifically explore the following: What prevents us from being at our parental best? If it’s hysterical it’s historical. Finding our own parenting voice. Rediscovering the gift of a normal day. Feeling seen and valued by the family.

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Soothing Anxiety, Over Controlling Behavior and Resistance in Early, Tween and Teen Years

Balancing our children’s lives has never been easy, and recently this has gotten a whole lot harder. Understandably, anxiety, fears can often lead to over controlling behavior. While this is no one’s fault it becomes more and more important to ease the pressure in small do-able ways that feel good for the whole family.

In this presentation we will explore the following topics: How to regain and retain what is developmentally and emotionally healthy for our kids; Creatively dealing with the new normal of the too much, too soon culture; Understanding the brain and nervous system reaction to overwhelm; Soothing “Soul Fever” so that the gifts our kids have within them can flow; Creating a “Safe Harbor” within family life so our kids can navigate life “out there” in a changing world.

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